Blow that low self esteem!

Have you ever felt that you missed out when God was dishing out talents to humans? Do you know someone who feels that he/she is good at nothing? Then let me tell you some home truth. There is no human that is useless in everything. Hey, even animals; who are considered lower than us, are talented. As I write this, a beautiful squirrel is in my garden making, what in my human eyes is a mess, but what in his is a methodology for unearthing some sustenance. Wish there is a way of letting it know that it must clean up after its mess! I just tidied my garden over the weekend.

I had a friend who used to envy my writing skills. She believed that she was 'no good' at anything, not even raising her kids, although she had three beautiful and well-mannered daughters that were the envy of the community. But try telling her that and she would quickly tell you that you were just saying it to make her feel good. She walked about with hunched shoulders, never looking people in the eyes. To make herself feel useful and wanted, she tried pleasing everybody, and subsequently got used by many.

This lady's curry dishes were to-die-for. Her chapattis rivalled those of Madhur Jafffery on Western palate, and her desserts were irresistible even for die-hard dieters. I knew because I was one of those who benefited from her largess and free nosh. Sad to say that some of us started asking her to produce dishes for our parties for free, which she was glad to do. We even passed these creations off as the works of our hands!

Still dying to be a writer, she once sent me her 'masterpiece' to view. It was worse than awful. A junior high school kid could have done better. Sorry to say that I took delight in changing the colour of her pages with a yellow marker! Her shoulders hunched twice after she received the corrected pages. "I told you that I can never be good at anything," she lamented.

That was when I allowed my good side to take over. My friend had very low self esteem. This has been described as the sum of a set of judgements about one's value, worthiness, and competence in various domains. She did the sum and got zero! I knew that she was high on the achievement ladder and just needed someone to point that out. About time I did some good deed, I told myself.

The next time she came bearing another awesome dish, I called her aside for a chat.
"Do you realise that your curry is the talk of this community?"
"O no!" she exclaimed her shoulders falling down a couple of notches, "I knew it, I knew that I can never make a good curry. People take it and pretend to like it. O dear, shall I...?"
"No, no, no, please listen" I cut in, placing a hand on her shoulders and pushing her face up. "You curry is the best for miles around and not only your curry," I rushed on. " Your pizza is great and your desserts even greater."
"Oh really?", she beamed looking me in the eyes.
"Yes," I continued. Have you ever considered selling these masterpieces because folks would pay a lot to have you cook for them."
"No! no!! no!! I can never do that."
"Yes! yes!!, yes!!! you can, and you should start by participating in the next International Food festival the community is holding."

To cut a long story short, she did sell her food and made quite a killing. That led to orders and sales from home. A lucrative business had taken off.

My friend started walking tall and I stopped getting free curries! But that's alright. The important thing was that she found her true calling

Have you found yours? I know that it is there. Just look hard or consult your friends. The honest ones will always tell you what you are good at.

Unless like me, they enjoy letting you steam for sometime.